Monday, November 14
This past Saturday I celebrated my sister Maggie's 30th birthday. She had three cakes and more friends than I could count to help her celebrate, and it was an intense experience. There's so much of me that still sees her as the funny little mess of a girl who I both adored and terrorized growing up. We've been so much to each other over the years - inspiration, confidante, aggravator, instigator - that there are times I think I understand what twins feel about each other. Maggie and I have been, and still are, so connected. There is rarely a time when my heart doesn't twinge a little when I see her. She's my baby sister. I claimed her as my own as soon as she came through the door, and I intend on staying true to that claim. I love you, Mary Magdelene. Happy Birthday~
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I too shared that experience and as I watched both of you that night I almost stopped thinking perhaps I wasn't the best mother in the whole wide world. One can only imagine this day when first you embrace this creature that somehow you created. My analogy of raising children has always been "the initial ripping pain that introduces the squirmy little things into yourlife is just the first of so many tearing pains as they grow further and further away from you." It is the nature of life, I know, to grow up and away and I have always encouraged this path and the celebration of 30 years since my last birth right seemed unreal to say the least. Weren't you both born just yesterday? I thought you were. And how come I am still only 30 or so myself? I am so proud to have the honor of such strong, smart, beautiful daughters. Children truly are an honor not a given in this world and for me the greatest success of my whole life.
By the way, you didn't quite embrace her when she first came home, you sort of looked at her from afar with curiosity and disdain all that the same time. I put her in your arms and watched all your skepticism wash away with love in its place. I can only hope that you experience this joy and wonder which is impossible to explain or understand until you first hold that litle squirmy being and count toes and fingers. I love you my sweet and your baby sister so much. Thank you for all the joy and pride you bring to my soul every time I hear your voice or hold you in my arms or cook one kick ass cookie and pumpkin cake.
Mommy
Oh, Myom. You're the myommiest myom that ever myommed. Don't you ever doubt your ability to myom us, you silly! Besides, anything that was difficult or strange growing up is all that asshole's fault anyway - you know that!
I love you!
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